Want

I’m sure there are a few people who are completely satisfied with their lives and don’t feel the urge to add something. For most of us, want is part of life. There are those who want world peace, those who want economic security, those who want health care for all and other large goals. There are those who want to lose 10 pounds and those who want a candy bar. It’s a human emotion…a gnawing feeling that we try to itch away.

Earlier this week, it was revealed that a healthcare worker who had been exposed to Ebola violated quarantine. Why? She wanted soup. She was vilified by the media for her selfishness.

When we want something, most of use try to figure out how to do it. When I want to go visit someone, I’ll make it happen. Sure, there are hurdles to overcome. But if I really want to do something, I’ll find a way around those hurdles. When I don’t really want to do something, I’ll find ways to make those hurdles into mountains so the “want” is just not attainable.

Want. Such a loaded word. It can drive you to change the world. Or change yourself. It’s a powerful descriptor for why people do what they do. Want can bring joy, satisfaction, release. It can also cause destruction, pain and suffering. Two sides of the same coin.

Your challenge: Think about what you want….big or small. Think about what you would need to accomplish that. Consider if it helps or harms others. Then, make a choice. Make a change. Do what you want and see how you feel. You just might learn something.

Hurt

Where there is desire
There is gonna be a flame
Where there is a flame
Someone’s bound to get burned
But just because it burns
Doesn’t mean you’re gonna die
You’ve gotta get up and try, and try, and try~ P!NK

We all have desires. They don’t all revolve around love nor money. We want world peace. We want peace in our neighborhood. We want ice cream. We want to end world hunger. We want to stop plagues. We want to get over our colds. We are humans and we want. Such is the metaphorical flame in these lyrics.

I got burned today. In my tireless pursuit to right perceived wrongs, I made a comment that apparently was inappropriate. It doesn’t matter the person on the receiving end has known me almost 2 years. It doesn’t matter that I have never done anything to make this person question my integrity. It doesn’t matter that the reasons for this statement weren’t related to the individual. All that matters is my comment.

It isn’t that I was called to the carpet that bothers me. I suspected that would happen when a third-party got involved. I’m really not that blind as to possible repercussions. What hurt was the lack of trust. The assumption that I had ulterior motives. I was judged and sentenced before I had an opportunity to explain. Boom.

Trust doesn’t come easy to me. You get my respect almost automatically, but you have to earn my trust. Consider it a gift. We can function on mutual respect, but a relationship is built on trust.

And, now it’s been erased. Another tick in the lessons learned column. I’ll keep trying, but it just won’t be the same.