Hurt

Where there is desire
There is gonna be a flame
Where there is a flame
Someone’s bound to get burned
But just because it burns
Doesn’t mean you’re gonna die
You’ve gotta get up and try, and try, and try~ P!NK

We all have desires. They don’t all revolve around love nor money. We want world peace. We want peace in our neighborhood. We want ice cream. We want to end world hunger. We want to stop plagues. We want to get over our colds. We are humans and we want. Such is the metaphorical flame in these lyrics.

I got burned today. In my tireless pursuit to right perceived wrongs, I made a comment that apparently was inappropriate. It doesn’t matter the person on the receiving end has known me almost 2 years. It doesn’t matter that I have never done anything to make this person question my integrity. It doesn’t matter that the reasons for this statement weren’t related to the individual. All that matters is my comment.

It isn’t that I was called to the carpet that bothers me. I suspected that would happen when a third-party got involved. I’m really not that blind as to possible repercussions. What hurt was the lack of trust. The assumption that I had ulterior motives. I was judged and sentenced before I had an opportunity to explain. Boom.

Trust doesn’t come easy to me. You get my respect almost automatically, but you have to earn my trust. Consider it a gift. We can function on mutual respect, but a relationship is built on trust.

And, now it’s been erased. Another tick in the lessons learned column. I’ll keep trying, but it just won’t be the same.

 

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