Truth is, I’ll never know all there is to know about you just as you will never know all there is to know about me. Humans are by nature too complicated to be understood fully. So we can choose either to approach our fellow human beings with suspicion or to approach them with an open mind, a dash of optimism and a great deal of candor.~ Tom Hanks

I discovered this past week that I have not been communicating as clearly as I could have been. I’m sure many of you have read blogs about what people with chronic illness want you to do. But, it seems that the affected person needs to do some things as well. Here’s my new list:

Never apologize for who you are. It gets on people’s nerves.

Stay in touch with the people you want in your life. If you make the effort, so will they.

Focus on the relationship, not your problems. Unless the person has specifically asked, they don’t want a medical tutorial.

It’s ok to say no. Just try to reschedule as soon as possible.

Friends want to be with you but may feel awkward. Acknowledge that you understand and ask them if they have questions you  can answer.

Focus on things you can do. Enjoy the time you have together with no regrets.

Finally, it’s not all about me. Relationships are two-way streets. Everyone has challenges and wants to talk about them. Don’t trivialize their concerns/situations just because you “have it worse.” It’s not a contest.

Come to think of it…this list applies to everyone. Whenever you hit a speed bump, keep these things in mind and hopefully you’ll get past that bump quickly.