Those People!

I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.~ Unknown

Have you ever met a person who just has to be right about everything? I’ve met quite a few, myself included. I guess it’s human nature to want to always “win” a discussion. To have the last word in an argument. But what happens when someone is so completely sure they have the only opinion that nothing else matters?

Some context here. I’ve been diagnosed with a disease that shows up in Rare Disease databases. Still in the process of confirming it and coming up with a lifelong plan for managing it. I have three other major diagnosis that must be managed as well. So, four biggies plus all the little stuff that humanity experiences. As you can imagine, the testing and doctor visits that led up to this have involved a number of personalities. Some were overbearing, some exceptionally timid. Some had nothing to contribute, others had some great theories. When chasing zebras, it’s best to remember that the hoofbeats make a different sound than expected. And then ,there was the doctor today.

Oh this one was a beauty. Hadn’t read my file until it was opened on the computer in my presence. Didn’t know my name, my medical history and had not even become familiar with why I was there. The file was read for 3-5 minutes and then the doctor launched into all the ways I could change my life. When I mentioned that x-condition wasn’t compatible with her suggestion, the answer was “what does it matter?” When I had processed a chunk of information and asked a question, I was told “don’t interrupt MY thoughts.” Ummmm, what about me? Isn’t this visit about me?

Not to be crass, but not only does this specialist charge my insurance $600 per visit, It cost me about $500 to come here this time. And I wasn’t even allowed to ask questions to figure out how to use the information being provided. It was literally do as I say or else. Well, I’m taking the or else. While some useful suggestions came out of the conversation, most of it was not applicable. It was a practiced speech, obviously recited so often that questions threw it off.

So I guess we’re both wrong. I agreed with the doctor just to stop the firehose of relatively useless information and being chided for not welcoming the doctor’s manna from heaven. The doctor was right from the start because as far as they were concerned, I’m an idiot who requires strict supervision, The doctor’s parting shot as we walked out was “I know you’ll do what you want anyway so why am I wasting my time?”

I honestly feel sorry for the doctor. There was an opportunity lost today. An opportunity to make a difference in someone’s life. But due to arrogance and poor presentation, the information is lost.

The lesson for all of us is to remember that regardless of how you say it, when your past catches up with you it’s not pretty. You don’t have to win. You don’t have to be superior. Just open your mind, see the potential and work with it. We are all students and we are all teachers. Recognize the time and place for what needs to happen and your past won’t run quite as fast to catch up with you.

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